I'm Through Accepting Limits

I just got back from a walk around my neighborhood, the first outdoors walk of the year for me. It was invigorating and refreshing and everything I have been looking forward to. Not only is Spring near, but today really felt like Spring. It snowed last night, first of all, and I went to bed with the vision of my car covered in snow. I went to bed fairly late and since I didn't have any immediate plans today, I turned off my cell phone and alarm and allowed myself to sleep in. Well, I woke up at 11:30, a bit later than I expected (but I guess I needed the rest!) and had some breakfast and made coffee. As I was eating my breakfast, I looked outside the kitchen window and saw that it was a drizzly day, but felt incredibly motivated to do something active. Well, I got busy cleaning the kitchen and bathroom, and when I was done, the sun was out and the forecast said a high of 51 today. I quickly changed into sweatpants and a windbreaker, dusted off my Ipod, and set out down the street.

I turned the corner about half a mile down the street onto a road that cuts through a country club. This road is all uphill. It's about a consistent 45 degree climb for at least a half a mile. As soon as I started up the hill, "Defying Gravity" from Wicked came on the Ipod. I haven't listened to this song since the summer, and I felt energized right away. Then it came to the lyric:

"I'm through accepting limits
'Cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change,
But till I try I'll never know"

I took those words and pushed myself for the rest of the walk. My mind became clear. I have been holding myself back from being healthy, telling myself that no matter how hard I try, I can't change. I'm not incredibly overweight, but I do have some "excess baggage", and my family's health history has Type II Diabetes in it. I have gained significant weight in the past 5 years for someone of my height and stature. And I was warned by my physician last year that I need to take action now while I'm young to prevent trouble later on.

I resolved on my walk to not limit myself mentally or physically. I can get healthy and have the body and strength that I want. I'm tired of making excuses as to why I can't lose weight or be healthier. I can. Just like it was effortless today to go out and walk, I need to just make it my lifestyle to go out and be active, to cook healthier, and turn decline offers of chocolate and sweets and lunches of pizza or Wendy's at the office. It's incredibly empowering having this mindset, that I truly am in control of my health and my body. I need to take care of what I have been given.

I was thinking during my walk...I watched the first half of My Fair Lady last night, starring the impeccable Audrey Hepburn. I would have watched the entire thing had I not kept dozing off. Anyways, Julie Andrews did the singing for the part of Eliza Doolittle. It was amusing watching Audrey obviously lipsynching, but it's really a charming movie. I was listening to Julie Andrews voice and thinking of how she really just can't sing anymore. She tried in The Princess Diaries II, but it sounded strained and lacking, the complete opposite of what you imagine when you hear The Sound of Music or Mary Poppins or anything she has brilliantly done...It's incredibly sad, and frightening, to think that something that defines you can be taken away. I was thinking about what my life would be like if I couldn't sing. I honestly don't know what my life would be like, if I had grown up tonedeaf...I would not be the same person. Would I have the same friends? I can't even begin to imagine.

So I thought a lot today on this walk about taking care of myself, and protecting the gifts I have been given. I have legs that move, healthy lungs and breathing, a sharp mind, and thank God I can sing. I cannot stress how important it is to respect and protect the gifts you have been given. You never know when they can be taken away.