I threw away my scale.

Well, it's not in the trash yet. It's on the back porch, waiting for trash day to come around, but it's not in the bathroom, tucked in the corner behind the toilet. It's out of sight, and for the first time in a while, it's not the first thing I think of when I wake up in the morning. See, I came to the realization yesterday that every day for the past I don't know how many years has started with me dragging my sorry butt out of bed into the bathroom to shower. I strip off my clothes, step on the scale, and decide what kind of day it will be based on that number. Will I have to try to eat a smaller portion at lunch or dinner? Will I feel super guilty when I give in (and I KNOW I'll give in) and have that pumpkin spice latte? Will I be pleasantly surprised and then binge in celebration?

I'm tired of it. It's a number. A freaking number that I've allowed myself to become defined by on a daily, sometimes two or three times daily basis. I'm done. I'm tired of "changing my lifestyle". I'm tired of being part of that group that says we're dieting but when we go home we drink wine and have an extra large helping of mashed potatoes and then giggle the next day and say "Oh well! Today's a new day, right??"

That's no way of living. In fact, it's reckless. I've been casting aside the responsibility of taking care of myself because I make excuses and say I can try again tomorrow. It's not about tomorrow. It's about today, and living and breathing now. I am sick and tired of worrying. I have today's number, and another number from 8 years ago that was my goal. Well, 8 years ago, I didn't have a chest or hips. And I wouldn't trade either of those things today for a lower number.

I will eat what I want, exercise the way I enjoy to, and learn to stop feeling guilty about choices that I make. How are you supposed to enjoy living with the level of guilt that half of us carry around day to day?

So I'm done with numbers. Done with THE number. It feels fantastic!

Come Rain or Come Shine...

As promised, some photography from this past weekend's wedding...

Heralds greeted us at the church and boat...Inside the church...Here comes the bride...Snacking before the reception...Cruising around lower Manhattan...First dance...A surprise for the guests; aerial photos of everyone on the deck at sunset. EPIC...Burlesque garter dance...Mad Men-esque (my new favorite show).

Odds 'n Ends

First of all, no I don't want to discuss the Pats loss to the Jets on Sunday. Both teams played well, and Jets fans can enjoy the glory while it lasts. My only hope is that they lose next week so Sanchez's ego deflates a little. His post-game press conference was a bit too smug for my taste.

We went to a wedding this past weekend for our friends and it was absolutely beautiful. I will post a few pictures here later.

My girlfriend from college is coming to visit this weekend and I am so excited because I have seen her twice since graduating. She has been in Scotland getting her masters degree the past two years, and she is going bak in January after our wedding. I can't wait to see her and catch up with her. She's one of those great friends that you might only see once in a great while but they are still one of your best friends in the world.

My birthday is a week from Saturday! I'll officially be in my late 20s, and frankly, I'm looking forward to it. Maybe I'm the only woman in the world who is ok with getting older, because I don't consider years a factor in age.

I skipped crock pot cooking this past weekend, but I promise I'll figure out something tasty to post this weekend!

Something more substantial to come...All I have for now is HAPPY FALL! And why is it 80 degrees?

4 months till Mrs.!

I am officially in full wedding planning mode, which is funny, because all the big stuff is booked and planned, now it's just details and execution. Sean surprised me yesterday with booking the limo, which was the last big vendor we needed to check off the list, so now it's really on me to get the invitations and paper items done, to confirm details and make any final choices or changes. I'm not feeling stressed or nervous, but every week that goes by I get more an more excited. I can't help but be amazed that it's all really happening. When did I get so lucky?

The little things are starting to occur to me. Everytime someone at works asks me what Sean's last name is and then they say my name with his last name, I realize I will really be entering a new phase of life. When I see people with babies, and realize that sooner rather than later (compared to 7 years ago when we got together) that will be us. And we'll be on the same insurance, bank accounts... It's a lot of change! But definitely good changes. It's all part of progressing as a couple. If we didn't grow and change together, life would be pretty boring.

This weekend we have a wedding to go to for our friends. Sean went to college with the groom, and they are such a fun, awesome couple. They're the first of Sean's college group to get married, so this is going to be quite a party on Saturday. I am so excited to be able to celebrate the day with them and the rest of our friends. And even more excited perhaps to see Sean decked out in his new 3-piece suit...

It is Time

It is ONE of the most wonderful times of the year in approximate 10 minutes.

The wings are in the oven, there's a Sam Adams in my hand, and my jersey is on.

#12 has been such an anticipated comeback from his injury last season, and I know he won't disappoint. And even with my #1 man Bruschi retired, I get to gloriously enjoy him now that he's employed by ESPN.

Life is good.

GO PATRIOTS!

Sucky-inny Underthings

I did it, ladies. I caved. I gave in to the fact that in 26 years, I have developed some curves that need some TLC if I ever want to wear a nice dress and not look like the Michelin Man. I'm through sucking in and adjusting every 2 seconds.

I bought a sucky thingy. That's what I'm calling it, because that's what it is. It starts right under the twins, and goes down to about mid-thigh, shorts style. It claims to control your midsection, butt, and thighs, and you don't even need to wear undies and worry about pantylines. I also bought a pretty dress to wear to a wedding next weekend, and wearing the two pieces together, I feel like a new woman!

I also kind of feel like Bridget Jones, with the completely unsexy underthing that no man should ever see. Luckily, I know who I'm going home with at the end of the night.

Fresh Salad, 95% Homegrown

I feel like a proud mama.

Let me explain...Over the weekend, Sean and I were discussing all the exciting things we could do for Labor Day. Last year, we went to Dick's and got fishing poles, licenses, and chilled out by the local lake, watching the bobbers bounce across the water. The year before that we went to Staten Island for a pool party barbecue. Considering we spent most of our weekend energy partying it up in New Jersey with friends who are getting married next weekend, the best we could come up with this year was to go out and give the yard one final hurrah of trimming, cutting, raking and weed-pulling.

One hour and one bee sting later (poor Sean!), our yard looked astronomically more presentable than it had due to three solid weeks of neglect.

Before: The hedge looked like Edward Scissorhands hair. The garden looked sad and ignored (because it was indeed sad and ignored. And bee infested.).





























After: You can't tell much of a difference from the pictures, but if this cooler weather keeps up, we'll probably only need to mow once more. But I digress...

So in my weeding of the garden which I had all but given up on (I could only weed about half because of all the bees, I think I counted 10), I came to realize that we had a good portion of fat green beans, lettuce, and one juicy red tomato. So I challenged myself when I got home today to make something healthy, no cooking, and only ingredients we already have.

Since it's been a while since we had a good grocery store trip, I decided on salad from the garden. I combined lettuce, green beans, chopped tomato, and chopped fresh basil from my kitchen (which although sad and a little wilty, I have not yet killed). I added a sprinkle of toasted pine nuts, a dash of cracked black pepper and a dabble of dijon mustard and olive oil.

I'll be honest, it's not the most delicious thing I have ever tasted, but knowing that about 95% of it was picked from our backyard and my little basil plant, it makes it that much more satisfying to eat.

But now it's time to stop blogging and settle in for some So You Think You Can Dance and GLEE! Until next time, cheers!

White Wine and Apple Cider Vinegar Porkchops and Potatoes

As requested in a comment on my previous post, here's the recipe for porkchops and potatoes that I made this past Sunday. I didn't follow a recipe, so the measurements are more eyeballed than exact.

Allow 5-6 hours cooktime on low in crock pot, 3-4 hours on high.

4 1" thick porkchops
4-5 russet potatoes, sliced 1/4-1/2" thick
2 small onions, one quartered, 1 cut in 1/4" slices
1/2 cup chardonnay
1/8 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup water
1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 teaspoon rosemary
1 teaspoon garlic, minced or ground (whichever you prefer)
salt and pepper to taste (I use sea salt and cracked black pepper, but ground works too)

Season porkchops with salt, pepper, and a light sprinkle of nutmeg and rosemary, set in bottom of crock pot (I use my small crock pot and do two layers of 2 chops). Wedge onion quartersin betwee and on the sides. Place onion slices on top of porkchops. On a separate plate, season potatoes with salt, pepper, garlic and rosemary. Simmer chardonnay, apple cider, nutmeg and rosemary until it bubbles, approx. 5-7 minutes. Slowly stir in water. Add mixture to crock pot, and place sliced potatoes on top. Cook on low for approx. 5 1/2 hours.

Note: You will be tempted to lift the cover and smell frequently. Keep in mind that this will add to your cooktime if too much heat escapes!

The porkchops are incredibly tender, but I was more surprised by the potatoes, as they retained more of the apple flavor. You can adjust any way you'd like, if you have a different white wine preference (I prefer chardonnay for cooking, it's a bit more bitter).

I am hoping to try this recipe again soon, but instead of white wine and cider vinegar, with cinnamon apple sauce. And maybe another time with an apple reisling, for a much sweeter meal. It's the wonderful thing about fall, there are so many delicious smelling and tasting flavors to use.

Enjoy!

Fall Festivities

This is my favorite time of year for many reasons. Not only is my birthday fast approaching, but it's the time of year Sean and I got together and fell in love, there is delicious pumpkin spiced beer and lattes and candles (oh my!), the air gets cooler and I can break out my sweaters and knee high boots, and most importantly....

Sundays. There is nothing that beats a Sunday in the fall. Starting next week, there will be football, dinner in the crock pot, and lazy afternoon for the next 12 weeks or so. I love throwing food in the crock pot and letting it warm up the house with it's delicious smells. I love having a beer at 2 in the afternoon watching the Pats. I love taking walks around the lake and smelling the leaves starting to decay and crisp.

We have quite a busy fall ahead of us. We're going to the Norwalk Oyster Festival next weekend with our friend for her birthday. I might try my very first oyster! We have a wedding the weekend after that, including a reception cruise around Manhattan (can't wait!), plus many Oktoberfest type activities. It sadly means Sean is back to his crazy work schedule for football season, but it means quiet time for me on the weekends if I need it.

Last week we kicked off the crock pot season with full chickens soaking in beer and spices. This week, I have porkchops and potatoes simmering in a white wine and apple cider vinegar reduction with nutmeg and rosemary. Sound yummy? It smells divine! I love cooking and even more I love eating what I cook, so I am always on the lookout for new recipes. Let me know if you have any you particularly love!