One is Silver and the Other's Gold

Were you ever a Girl Scout? If you were, then you probably learned the friendship song:

Make new friends,
but keep the old,
one is silver
and the other's gold...

Sean and I were talking about boy scouts and girl scouts recently (I had told him I was so excited to be marrying an Eagle Scout, they're a rare breed!), and that little song came up. It got me thinking the past few days about my friends. I have always been saddened that I don't have someone in my life who I can say "This is _______, we've been friends since we were little." It seems I have had different friends who I have been close to in different times and places in my life, but not one solid best friend who I've always turned back to.

It has made planning our guest list rather difficult for me, because there are so many people who I have felt close to at some point in my life who I want to be there on our special day. I can't narrow it down to 2 or 3 best friends. I am the type of person who is close to the people who are involved in my life at the time. I have recently been trying to be a better friend to those who I was close to in school in Boston and even high school. Whether it's been reconnecting through Facebook or wherever, I have been feeling this desire to make these people more of a priority in my life.

When I moved after college, I moved wholeheartedly, accepting that things in my life would change. I grew closer to some amazing people I met through Sean and is his college, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I have also made a couple very close friends through work, and without them I don't know how I'd have gotten through the past 2 1/2 years. The first 6 months I spent here were the most difficult in my life. But because of those experiences, I was able to build very strong friendships with the people who were there for me.

I don't quite know where I am going with this. I guess a part of me feels torn because I love my life here, but I can't help but miss my friends from back home. I get sad when I miss out on a birthday celebration or New Year's party, a housewarming for someone's new apartment or just being able to get together for a cup of coffee. On a weekend I was home, I got brunch with two of my girlfriends from college, and it was such a great morning. We caught up, we talked about weddings, they told me about grad school and their jobs and what's going on in their lives. I left feeling so happy that we were able to get together, and sad that I didn't know the next time we'd be able to do that.

I know it's the natural course of life for people to go in seperate directions to do what they want to do, and you get together or call each other when you can. One of my best friends from high school is in Arizona for grad school, and strangely, we keep in touch pretty well because we decided to write each other letters so we would have something other than bills to look forward to in the mail. Another friend from high school, my maid of honor, I see every time I go home, and we call each other at least once a week just to chat. My college friends are all over the place. Some are still around Boston, but my closest friend went to Scotland for grad school. She's coming back to Massachusetts for a few months, but she'll probably try to go back to Scotland permanently in the next year or so. Another friend is in Japan in the Navy. She's the lead singer in a rock band that tours and entertains on ships and on bases all over the world.

My goal this year is to be not only a better person in general, but to be a better friend. I want to know what's going on in their lives, and I want to make more of an effort to see people when I can. This past weekend we went to Staten Island to a friend's house, as he normally comes up to various parties and gatherings in our area. It was nice to get away and give him the chance to host us, and I didn't really mind driving 2 hours for the overnight. I know it takes effort both ways to keep friendships alive, so I am going to do my best to uphold my end.